There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
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