halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.