I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
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Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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