Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
