You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
