Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
