I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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