Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
