I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
