YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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