I feel great
I just peed on a car
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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