sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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