there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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