as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
