Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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