Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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