I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize