I'm so fucking centered right now
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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