i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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