she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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