He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
