hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
