so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.