He felt like a one man threesome
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize
