i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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