Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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