Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
