Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
