I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
