She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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