I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize