I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize