i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Randomize
