wat bout pragnant strippers??
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
