Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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