Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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