I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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