I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize