I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Randomize