Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
