He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
