This girl is more easily done than said...
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize