Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Is this making any sense, because Iβm puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize