Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I just want nice things and good sex
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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