Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
