It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
