But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Randomize
