im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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