do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
