Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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