I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
